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  1. It turns out that all theories pertaining to general relativy are false (all experiments proving it were faked as part of a conspiracy)
  2. Whenever you laugh (for any reason) you simply say "tee-hee"
  3. Only speak English in China
  4. Justin Beiber breaks both his legs but continues to release music for the rest of his life
  5. Dragons exist and they like to take humans as pets
  6. For the rest of your life, wear normal clothes, but have everyone think it looks odd
  7. Live in Cartagena
  8. Be Princess Peach
  9. Urinate Gasoline
  10. When you die your spirit spends between 0 and 1000 years in agony, depending on how good you are. After that you go on to eternal joy.


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