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  1. Be cursed to change into a donkey any time someone calls you an "ass", only changing back when someone calls you a "human"
  2. Everything you touched turned into gold
  3. Have 12 children
  4. It rains fire on your home city for 15 minutes
  5. Live without technology
  6. Humans were born in a limbless larval state similar to a giant maggot with a humanoid face. They're as intelligent as normal children and can learn to speak but only metamorphose into adult form around their sixteenth birthday.
  7. Be a dwarf
  8. Eat nothing but Burger King for the rest of your life
  9. Have braces for the rest of your life
  10. Be married to Tom Brady


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