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  1. 50% of the time when you go to speak you just mumble incoherently
  2. Sweat poison (that you are immune to)
  3. A bizarre mishap leaves you a quadruple amputee, but gives you invulnerability and the ability to fly like superman
  4. Live a life without pizzas
  5. Live in a world of perpetual Groundhog Day
  6. You are immortal and invincible but you become a solid rubber ball one foot in diameter. You can bounce and roll yourself around and you can speak but you can't otherwise manipulate your surroundings.
  7. Find out the Little Richard is your real father
  8. A bum off the street walks up to you and licks your face three times
  9. Get beat up by Jackie Chan
  10. Discover that, due to a freak time travel accident that will someday leave you stranded in the past, you are actually your own parent.


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