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You have to pick:

Have everyone sing The Unbirthday song from Alice in Wonderland to you every day but be ignored on your real birthday
 
or
 
Thou must speaketh only in Early Modern English (aka "Shakespearean" English), with thee/thou/thy/thine/etc.

 
Comments
danielkinane

This would get extremely irritating extremely quickly.

RoguePainter

EVERYONE would sing it to you

JonThompsonsEmail

Yeah, but its over quickly. Basically your sacrificing what 1-2 minutes a day.

Sure its a negative, but a lot better than 99% of the other stuff on this site.

bjfreeman801

Out, damned spot! Out, I say!—One, two. Why, then, ’tis time to do ’t. Hell is murky!—Fie, my lord, fie! A soldier, and afeard? What need we fear who knows it, when none can call our power to account?—Yet who would have thought the old man to have had so much blood in him.

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