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You have to pick:

Wake up each morning to be stabbed, electrocuted, shot, punched and ran over by a 16-wheeled semi truck
 
or
 
Have a movie based on your life that is highly inaccurate

 
Comments
stephenmeister

as long as it's a good movie.

bryan.derksen

Won't have to put up with that for long, at least.

JonThompsonsEmail

I can only assume you magically survive this. In fact, I'm going to assume you aren't harmed, but rather you feel the pain from all this but somehow survive unscathed.

Otherwise this really sucks and is basically akin to "you die tomorrow morning."

IMFeatherlin

The movie would get very little critical acclaim and would probably never be seen

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